People say I should not trust..
They teach me to Not Trust


I can distrust the whole humanity, But that includes ME as well...

Forever Your’s

It was a beautiful day when Arvind was to take his scheduled bus to Kota. He chose to commute by bus to buy out time; he would need it anyways to plan out even the miniscule details to perfection. There was no way he could allow even one mistake on his part this time. The bus driver stepped in the bus and looked around, Arvind’s heart was racing and the nervous excitement was almost palpable. He seemingly and willfully allowed the feel to percolate and infect his senses. He enjoyed every moment that was to take him to Kota, to Charu.

The bus driver injected the keys into the engine, it sniffed with a roar and in no time the engine was bought to life. The engine pipe vomited the thick black vapour into the air and bang, the bus was now leaving behind the by passengers, the tea stall and in no time the bus stand had vanished giving way to the green plush turf. Arvind squirmed to adjust himself to comfort and closed his eyes, moist by now with nostalgia. He parted his dry lips to a soft mumble “Here I come…”

Te journey had begun and the roads stood besieged, as if waiting to take him to his love, who had once been her life and still was. The time flew by ever since he had last met her, the memories were afresh and his love intact.
He slowly dragged the brown envelope from his bag and began reading it. He had lost count of the times he had been through the black print, and consequently the agony. Infact, he had read it the day he last met Charu. The final letters of the report gave him the courage to do what he had been planning so long.
Adjusting himself once again to the narrow to the comfort seat of the bus, he started reading it again. Slowly. Carefully.

“Listen”, he darted back at the tear filled eye “I think I have had enough of all this. I have bagged a job in the States that I was after for so long and there’s no holding me back now. Not even you.”

A drop trickled down her flushed cheeks. “Not even me?” she croaked with effort.
I never intend to hold you back Arvind. I just need you, your love. Please don’t do this to me. Not now when ...”

“Not now? He barked cutting her short. He turned afraid she might read what was going on in his mind. He wanted to throw his arms around her embrace her to a tight hug and promise to never leave her. A promise he intended to honour. A promise he knew he could never honour, not when he had been diagnosed of leukemia.

She stood there speechless, looking at Arvind in the eye, searching for one weak moment that he would surrender to for she knew Arvind was genuinely in love with her, until now.
He turned to leave.

The bus driver slammed the brakes dragging Arvind out of his reverie. He gave a last look at the pages he held before folding them back neatly in the envelope.

The night passed in anticipation and at 7 am, the tyres screeched to bring the bus to a halt.
“Kota”, announced the bus helper.

He took the lane straight to 12, Narendra Road carrying the butterflies in his stomach. He kept making images of how Charu might be looking though it wasn’t too long that shed been out of his sight.
He placed a soft knock and the door opened with a thud.

The old lady at the door spoke to Arvind in inquisition “Yes..?”

Just when he was about to speak, something else caught his attention. It was unmistakably the same beautiful face he had missed so much. Just the sight of her and he felt his knees weakening. The same brown eyes stared back her him and the tresses were neatly arranged though some managed to fly around her broad forehead, making her look even more stunning.

Suddenly something hit him hard in his mind, “Damn!” He said and fell on his knees and began to weep uncontrollably.

It took him an hour before he could recover the shock and looked at the lady who was now standing by his side. “Aunty, I don’t know... I...Just…” he fumbled, choosing the right words.
The lady gave him a flat look and drew a brown envelope from her cupboard without speaking a word. They both knew each other but the tie between them was now snapped by the fateful hands of time.

“Here” She said.

He sat adjacent to the wall from where he could not see Charu but she looked at him from behind the silver cast frame that was ornated with a blue white garland. The broad smile was invariably the same. He remembered this particular picture very well. It was her favourite and his too. He closed his eyes again, tighter this time to squeeze out the last drop of tears.

The flipped open the envelope and began to read. Slowly. Carefully.

Arvind,

Its been really difficult living without you, but what’s more difficult is to live with the fact that you love me no longer.
I have awaited your return since then, and today I give up and I give up on life.

I close my eyes with one last wish, please don’t turn around to hide your tears.

And yes, couldn’t tell you this the last day we met. “I love you”

Forever Your's

Charu

“Me too...” He drew a deep breath and turned around, this time to face her.



Charu Kaushal


PS: Please leave in your comments.

Five Minutes Of Fame

And the winner is….yeh hum aapko batayenge ek chotte se break ke baad!!

Zoom goes in another commercial. Aren’t these commercials far much able than such singing so-called-reality-shows, which have been revolving around the same concept ever since Sonu Nigam got his first ever break in Sa Re Ga Ma as a host??

The model has invariably given us talent that we relish till date. Sanu Nigam, Shaan, Sunidhi Chouhan, Shekhar, Kunal Ganjawala to name a few. The concept has reached its saturation after being exploited, and continuing to be, by all the channels one can fathom. When the desh ki janta was already getting acidic by over dose, the voting calls keep coming in. This time it was churning the rotten candidates that the sauntering janta had already decided to do without. The long forgotten candidates were given a chance to relive the drama, hurling the janta towards the pain of voting. What the heck!! If this was not all, the spat between the judges is artificially created and organized to a hype and is then sold for better TRP. They never seem to get enough. To make it worse, it’s now been coupled with dancing, hosted by our very own, and talented (read not) Ravi Anand! Does this man qualify at all to represent and host a show!! Of course he does. Any man in the industry who runs out of work does. And that’s the guru mantra to keep the cash resisters ringing. Applies to the channels, to the singers (if they at all can) and certainly the hosts and the hostess!!

Soon after the series gets wound up, lost are the faces in the 5 minutes fame which were once cheered for so vehemently, some of which certainly deserve. Remember Rooprekha, Qazi, Sandeep, to name some cheered and long forgotten winners!

But, picture abhi baaki hai mere dost! Don’t forget to switch on your television set- never mind the channel as all must be airing the same conceptual singing drama- at 10 pm. Who knows you find a familiar face that you once vouched for. Hang on, even if you have forgotton their names in the long list of “singers”, the reminders would be to shortly provided..” Please mujhe vote karma na bhoolen, mere voting information hain…..”

Dekha, ab yaad aaya na!

PS: Readers comments and opinions are invited!

There is a famous paradox that CEAT is using currently as its marketing instrument- The only thing permanent is CHANGE..

Samilar is the situation where I am currently! The frame for my situation is "The only certainity here is uncertainity".

Though there is the difference of just one prefix, the impact is toxicating... :(

PS: Readers comments and opinions are invited!

Just The Matter Of Time

The journey seemed difficult, but he had to start anyway. Vicious, so to say, but the hostile road lay besieged to its only occupant. Although he came across as a frail persona, his aura deprecated all incoherence.

He kept walking with heavy steps, reposing his presence on the unmade road, mentally maintained repository of all details he set his eyes on. It was almost dusk when he noticed a 14-year old boy trying to escape the inced crowd. He approached the boy when he managed to dodge his chasers And learnt that he was a petty thief who has been exempted. The old man placed his hands on his fore-head and tried to deter him from stealing in the future. The boy gawked at him in mistrust and fled without uttering a single word.

The old man made a mental note of it….

He resumed his purpose and kept walking, until he came across a man of uncouth disposition. He flirted with dirty streets and reveled his inane existence. The old man noticed his lower limbs unfurled in a queering fashion, only to further deprecate his appearance. On a small conversation with this man of sporadic mannerisms, he understood that he had lost his leg to a gory accident. The man lamented and wept with grief but never tried to combat his unruly fate. Despite the ineffable efforts old man, failed to make him realize the importance of life, so he decided to wait and watch what fate had in store for him! He rose to his feet and this time it was certain to see him again, and he knew it would be soon…

He resumed his purpose. Days passed by….

As he walked past the desolated street, he saw an old man from distance. His sprawling limbs were confined to the ambit of his tattered mattress. He sat there with mouth slightly ajar, as though from eternity, under the vigilant sun who did not miss any opportunity to make brute foray at his sagging skin and sans eyes. The beggar forced his eyes open and tried to recognize the much familiar face which bore such surreptitious expressions that sufficed fairly to perplex him. All that he could manage was to strain his wits to fathom the cryptic smile that played back and forth him.

Finally the old man spoke:

“ Why are you having troubles recognizing me? You have seen me before. I met you when you were a 14 year old kid trying to escape the people who caught you stealing. I tried to make you understand the vices of your trade but u never listened to me and continued with it until you me t with a gruesome accident which permanently disabled you from walking, let alone running. That was the first lesson for you. I had to come to see you again when you were wasting your life cribbing over what you lost. You again ignored what I said and here I am, for the last time to see you living how you chose to. You would have saved your legs and the Sun had you conceded in me then.. True, Man is what he chooses to be”

The words struck the beggar in the heart and he wept.. Finally when he opened his eyes the old man was gone…Time again was gone..!!!!

PS: Readers comments and opinions are invited!